I'd have to see the photos to give you a more specific answer, but there is a painter's trick of decreasing the brightness and saturation from objects that you want to recede...see an example at
http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7768/2092/640/coolit.jpgThis is done by creating 2 adjustment layers-- one to manipulate the saturation
and another to manipulate the Luminance- and painting on the adjustment mask with a black paintbrush, then radial zoom blurring the masks. (2 separate
masks allows you to manipulate the intensity of each part of the effect separately
by adjusting the opacity of the adjustment layer)
This particular demo was fairly obvious, as it was done to teach the technique,
but you can acheive great subtlety with this technique
The DOF blur, however, was done in camera. I've seen lots of techniques, filters
and plugins that say they can create DOF and bokeh, but they're all more work than getting it
right to begin with.
HTH